The desire for intimacy never dies

I was trying to think of some new and creative ideas for this weeks blog post. I feel like my content has been getting a little stale. Our business is fascinating since we get to help people with a very personal part of their lives. Needless to say, we hear a lot of interesting stories but are extremely careful to protect all of our patients’ privacy. With that said, and without divulging any names, I was very touched today by a conversation I had with a long term patient and his wife.

Both are well beyond their mid 80’s. My patient’s wife is now using a walker since getting around has become very difficult. They were relaying to me that she has had 2 heart attacks in the last year. The 2nd heart attack was nearly fatal. My patient, who is 88, is holding up a bit better albeit with a lot of medication and a fading memory. In spite of their health issues they desparately want to find a way to be intimate.

She took time to tell me how she fell in love with him the first time she met him when she was about 14 years old. As things would turn out they didn’t marry until later in life. My patient said he takes care of his wife 100% of the time. He has to do all the work around the house since she is no longer able. He said she is his number one priority. If he did anything that would hurt her he couldn’t live with himself.

At this point we had to talk realistically about their abilities to have intimacy. They both expressed a strong desire to be together but we asked that they needed to seriously weigh the risks with regard their health. Our Dr. asked that they start with an honest assesment by their long term physician. After that, they can have a discussion whether to proceed further with our doctor.